Jennifer

History

Member for

2 years 9 weeks

Blog

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General Information

Gender

female

Age

20

Location

Tucson, AZ

Personal Information

Biography

I am a woman, a child, a writer, an incest survivor, a feminist, a humanist, a reader, a healer, a lover, a recovered bed wetter, liar and spouse abuser. I am also recovering from an eating disorder, which I had for most of middle school and high school. I have a love/ hate relationship with my body. I am emotional, compassionate, controlling, and self-rejecting. I am brilliant but I question every letter in that word and every thought that comes out of my mind. I have endless notebooks filled with half started stories. I am a perfectionist and a procrastinator; I am organized at work (mostly) but my house is a mess. I have six animals (cats and dogs only) and treat them as my children. (They can even sleep with me if they want. :) I would never turn away a child in need. I am an activist and gardener.

I love to listen but also know that I am a huge influence on others as I share the tales and lessons of my life. I am not graceful. I was born a writer, not a ballerina or athlete; I just wish I would have been given the opportunity to learn things like dance and sports. I attended twenty different schools in my childhood and missed out on a lot of things. By providence, I ended up in Tucson, Arizona. I graduated from high school in three years. I have been in therapy for more than six months now. I love and respect my therapist. He is one of the only men I trust. I’ve been working for a law firm representing children and low income parents for almost two years now.

My biological parents are too broken and/ or proud to heal themselves from addiction, incest (on my mother’s side) and many other issues. I don’t speak to either of my parents; my father by my choice but my mother because she left our family at age six. My mother left me with a very poor sense of self. She used her body and sex to get her way. She drank and abused drugs way too much and made it very obvious that I was a hassle. She was a beautiful woman and I feel so horrible that she had such a monstrous childhood. Many of the men in her life were abusers, several have been in jail, even prison for molest charges and murder.

I lived a very sheltered life with my father. I was never allowed to be a normal child because I was to smart. I grew up very confused because his actions did not reflect his words. He spouted feminist ideals, but used women for his own pleasure and martyrdom. I was allowed to watch sexual movies but not violent movies. My entire adolescence I watched my father cycle through many, many women, sometimes several at a time. They were always broken in his eyes and was always trying to fix them. When he broke up with them, I heard for months, even years after, that women in America are broken and fat, so a man has to get them young, (almost as if we need training).

My sheroes

My grandmothers, grandfather, Patti Caldwell, my old friend, Rhette, Maya Angelo, Abigale Adams, Heather, Annie Oakley, Susan Sarandon, Jeyoani and all the women at AGA, my friend, Adi, and many others.

Personal goals

To finish college, to become a certified foster mother, a published author, to heal myself through education, and many more.

Bragging Rights

I am brilliant and compassionate. I am working through my horrendous past to heal myself. I work for an amazing law firm that represents families in CPS cases.

Favorite books

Where the Red Fern Grows, Are You My Mother?, Miss America by Day, A Different Kind of Love, 1984, Harry Potter and libraries more.

Favorite music

The Fray, Liz Phair, Alanis, Jewel, Evergreen Terrace, Killswitch Engage, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Deanna Carter, The Dixie Chicks, Corinne Bailey Rae, Natasha Bedingfield, Pink, U2, India.Arie, The Fugees, Eric Clapton, Stevie Nicks, Atreyu, Christina Aguilera, Matchbox 20, The Goo Goo Dolls, Dave Matthews, Billie Holiday, KT Tunstall, Sheryl Crow, Martina McBride, Norah Jones, Bright Eyes, Anna Nalick, Coldplay, MATISYAHU!!!

Favorite Films

Evida, Garden State, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, The Salton Sea, Girl, Interrupted, Pumpkin, Secretary, Kalifornia, A Love Song for Bobby Long, The Jacket, Almost Famous, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Big Fish, Rent, Chicago, The Little Mermaid, Oliver and Company, Hercules, Anastasia, American History X, Schnidler's List, all kinds of Nova films, King Arthur, A League of Their Own, many many more.

Hobbies

Writing, reading, walking my dogs, watching movies at home, rain, gardening, watching things grow, education, inspiring people, being inspired, blogging, shopping, family get together's, volunteer work, talking to my out of state family on the phone, the Discovery Channel...